When a College Student Wants to Drop Out

A parent’s heart often sinks when they hear their son or daughter say, “I don’t want to go back to college.” The reasons that prompt this statement are many. The student may not have made friends or adjusted to life away from home. Increasingly, access to financial assistance is tightening, and students may be worried about money. Some students lose interest because they went to college to play a sport they can no longer play. And unfortunately, some students get over-involved socially, manage their time poorly or struggle academically, finding themselves unhappily on academic probation or facing dismissal from the institution.

The costs to dropping out are many. First, the school loan paybacks begin immediately. Second, a degree was not achieved, so employment options are limited. Students typically move back home, unable to afford an independent lifestyle. And, students who are not enrolled full time frequently lose access to their family’s health insurance and move into the uninsured category.

Students without academic and career goals are at risk for dropping out. In his paper on promoting student success, Vincent Tinto, Ph.D., states that “lack of goal clarity serves to undermine the willingness of students to meet the demands of college life and enhances the likelihood that individuals will, when stressed, leave rather than persist.” When unsure of their direction, it is all too easy for disengaged 18 to 21-year olds to cut classes, get poor grades, and drop out. What could change this scenario?

1. Reflection
   Too often we view college as the next step after high school without understanding the knowledge and skills needed to be successful in college. Or, that there are different paths available. Remember, high school is required and our students still live with us. College is optional and requires a significant degree of self-management and focus. Course selection is dictated by the college major. Without a plan it is easy to get sidetracked.
2. Leadership
   As leaders, parents can help students by revisiting and collaboratively defining expectations about the college investment. Those expectations and priorities vary from family to family, but most view college as a developmental experience transitioning our students from adolescence to adulthood. At the end, we expect that they will have developed sufficient knowledge, skills and abilities to be employable in a career that provides for self-sufficiency and financial responsibility. Questions to ask: Have we laid the foundation for independent choices in lifestyle, personal maintenance and understanding of the effort needed to succeed in college, and set a direction for graduation? Was this the right college or program? Were our and our student’s expectations realistic?
3. Consider the Research
   Students who start college with academic and career goals that are aligned with their aptitudes (natural strengths) and interests have a better chance at experiencing success. Seeing their career goal as the “light at the end of the tunnel,” self-directed students know why they are going to college, and are more persistent when facing the few “tough” or “boring” courses that might be required.
4. Move on to Plan B
   If you haven’t worked with a credentialed career professional, don’t wait! Working together, a professional can help create a realistic understanding of a student’s interests and abilities, and select appropriate career goals that require different levels of academic commitment. The goal is to build on success and work a plan. For many students, the community college is an option to jump-start their education. But again, without a sense of purpose or a plan, many students find it difficult to fully engage and stop attending.

It may be useful to heed the words of Lester Bittel, author of The Nine Master Keys of Management:“Good plans shape good decisions. That’s why good planning helps to make elusive dreams come true.”